Most of us love a good framework.<\/p>\n
Nothing gives us more comfort and confidence that using a tried and tested framework or model, especially if it\u2019s from a fancy university or professional services firm. The challenge with most frameworks though is that we like to follow it a bit like a recipe – so that we don\u2019t get it wrong.<\/p>\n
Coaching has started, over the past few years, to gain traction in many organisations with the view that coaching is available to anyone. It doesn\u2019t matter where you are in the organisational hierarchy, you have a coaching responsibility to develop and grow your peers. In other organisations it\u2019s still relegated to the line manager who believe it\u2019s just about setting performance and development goals. Many struggle when having these conversations for fear of not getting the framework right.<\/p>\n
A few years ago I facilitated a workshop for a group of senior leaders where we stressed the importance of building rapport as step 1 to understand the coachee\u2019s state of mind, and to give them a chance to relax into the conversation. I can\u2019t tell you the number of people who struggled with this task. My response to these questions? Find out. Ask them the questions, not me.<\/p>\n It\u2019s critical to understand the expectations of each individual coachee. Some like to chat about the football; others want to have serious conversations about their career; some want to raise a concern; others will find it awkward talking to you and will want to run for the door.<\/p>\n It\u2019s your job as the coach to find out how you can be most helpful to the other person.<\/p>\n Use the framework as a guide, but don\u2019t take it as gospel or you\u2019ll end up running a conversation that\u2019s driven by your needs and not theirs.<\/p>\n So what does it mean to have a conversation?<\/p>\n There are two things here; understand the topics of conversation and ask strengths-based questions. Be personable and give them the space to talk about aspirations, challenges, or even having a whinge if needed.<\/p>\n I like to open the conversation by using GRIP<\/strong>.<\/p>\n It works a treat in that awkward space at around the 5-6 minute mark between casual chit chat and getting to the serious side of the conversation. GRIP helps me manage the conversation while getting a mutual understanding of what needs to be discussed.<\/p>\n Here\u2019s how it works:<\/p>\n You don\u2019t need to share this tool with your coachees or team. Just use it in your mind at the beginning of a coaching session to articulate how your time should be spent. Your coachees will thank you for the clarity.<\/p>\n It\u2019s easy to fall into the trap of playing to the negative mindset, which doesn\u2019t help someone resolve anything. Strengths-based questions allow you to be positive and future oriented so that coachees can consider how to take stock and prepare for change.<\/p>\n Here are some questions you might like to try out.<\/p>\n As with everything, it takes practice. But these simple tips can help you move beyond the framework and into real conversations that spark positive outcomes for you and your coachees.<\/p>\n
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\n“What do I ask them? Does it have to be personal? What if they cry? How much time should I spend here? What if they\u2019re cranky<\/em>?<\/p>\nUnderstand the topics of conversation<\/h2>\n
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Strengths-based questions<\/strong><\/h2>\n
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